How many times have you sat on your phone scrolling through social media looking at someone’s posts and thinking to yourself “wow I wish I was doing that” or “they look so happy” or “I wish I was out having fun like them instead of sitting in my room by myself on a Saturday night”? If you answered, never, congratulations! You are a superhuman! Unfortunately the sad reality is that for most of us, comparing ourselves to others on social media isn’t even a conscious choice at this point. Our generation has been born into a world where everything is shared and I don’t think we realize the extent to which this affects our emotions.

Take happiness for example. For starters, what is happiness? Solomon tells us that happiness is not an emotion but instead is a kind of “meta-emotion, an ongoing summary evaluative judgment about our being in the world”(Solomon, 265). He argues that reflection is a key part to happiness and that it depends on the moments where “one gets a glimpse of our lives as a whole, or at least, of some substantial portion of our lives from the necessarily limited perspective of our current life experience”(Solomon, 266). I agree completely with this claim that happiness isn’t about a feeling but about how we feel about our own lives and our accomplishments. That being said, this is already much, MUCH easier said than done, but what Solomon doesn’t account for is the evolution of technology and how it makes it that much harder to master this skill. In this day and age, everything is posted online, and I mean everything. Let me paint you a picture.You just found out you got a 93 on that accounting test you’ve been grinding your ass for. You feel great. You feel proud of yourself and don’t feel any remorse for missing that big party on Friday because it paid off. You get home, sit on the couch and open your phone to see that one of your classmates posted that they not only got a 96, but they also got that internship they applied for, AND they went to the party on Friday. Immediately, you start to think to yourself “How?” “They are so much better than me”, “I missed the party to study and still did worse than them”. Granted you can’t blame these thoughts only on social media because they did come from you. But regardless, being exposed to thousands of people’s successes is not always the best thing for the mind. It can also work in the reverse. Many people compare their social media to other people’s and put others down in their heads which is also not a healthy thing to do. Let it be noted that my claim here is not that social media is the sole cause for mental health issues amongst young adults and teens, but it adds an extra layer of difficulty that our parents and therapists simply don’t understand. As much as they might say they do, the reality is that they don’t because they weren’t born into it and don’t understand how much social organization revolves around the internet. I think the biggest challenge that comes with social media and why it affects our happiness is because it is the biggest supporter of the monsters we call envy and jealousy. Solomon says the following about envy: “The immediate focus of envy isn’t oneself, who does in fact suffer, but another person or other people, who may not know they are being envied at all, and some specific particular feature, possession, or benefit.”(Solomon 101). It makes sense that social media is the biggest fuel for envy because that’s where people go to show off that exact particular feature, possession, or benefit. Let’s talk about women for example. As hard as it is to admit, we are constantly comparing our physical features to the women we see online, and imagine how hard it is to be constantly seeing all the unrealistically beautiful models and influencers online while dealing with our own body insecurities. How can you not be envious? Again, I’m not blaming social media for creating the feeling of envy because that comes from our own insecurities and our own problems that we need to work through. I’m merely saying that it adds another layer of difficulty in a way that has never been experienced by previous generations. Yes, you might argue that previous generations had magazines and commercials to feel envious about. But think about the extent to which we are on our phones and on social media. I believe that it doesn’t even compare. Let’s talk about jealousy now. I think this one is the most affected emotion by social media because it’s all about ego. Solomon tells us that jealousy differs from envy because jealousy is the fear of loss. But there is one specific aspect of jealousy that Solomon talks about that I think is very relevant here: honor. “In other words, there is also a fourth party to jealousy, and that is the anonymous ‘other’ of society, public opinion…It is not just a matter of loss but of humiliation, loss of honor.” (Solomon, 107). The best example I can think of for this is a breakup. Breaking up with someone you love is already one of the most emotionally painful things you can go through on its own. But in this day and age, when you break up with someone you can’t help but think about what other people are going to say about it. Not only are you worrying about yourself, you’re worrying about what people might think when they stalk your instagram and see that you removed all your posts together. Or what they might think if they see your ex posting with someone new a mere few weeks after your breakup. Or worse. The pain you’ll feel when you open your snapchat to see that your ex posted a picture with their new significant other at YOUR special spot.

So, in conclusion, what solution do I propose moving forwards? None. I don’t have a solution for this dilemma because I’m living it and trying to figure it out for myself, and don’t get me wrong I think social media has tons of benefits and again, we can’t blame it for our emotions and our insecurities. I just think that moving forwards philosophers need to take into account the modern world we live in because it’s very easy to focus on your own life when it’s the only one you’re exposed to. But the reality of our lives is that we’re not exposed to just our own lives. We’re exposed to the lives of our friends, family, acquaintances, and the millions of other people on social media that we don’t even know yet still compare ourselves too.

Shared by: Anonymous
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